Comments
1) Comments on my blog
I have got the 3 comments on my second Blog Draft. They read my Blog Draft interestingly and informative, but said me something what I have to correct a sentence for good paragraph. First, Hojung said me, 'Please write down more supporting sentences.' Because I used word 'various aspects', readers needs several reasons to understand. However, I did not write 'several' reasons, there is only one reason. Therefore I corrected word just 'It is clear'. Second, Sojin suggested me like 'change your writing as one paragraph without using space until the paragraph is ended.' I absolutely agree this suggestion, but I cannot take care of this problem on time. In addition, she suggested that I should use at least one reference. Third, Chaeyeon agree my paragraph. She and her friend started Instagram for only sharing of pictures. In short, I've got the 3 comments on my second Blog Draft, and they suggested me for various aspects. Their comments are very useful for me.
2) Comments on other blog
Blog Draft #1
EW2-020 T/Th
Hi June,
I think so too. I heard that Seoul's internet system is best of world. My friends have come back from Europe travel at the last vacation, and she said, "I can't find easily free Wi-Fi zone! It was so inconvenient". I think we live in convenient city.
Have a good weekend.
Jieun.
EW2-047 T/Th
Hello Jihye,
Incredible! I am so surprised because you have over 15 different lipsticks. You are right, I was tempted to spend money for cosmetic at any street too, but we have to get rid bad habits. Then I think Seoul makes a lot of park good for excercise, and you make the best use of that.
Have a good weekend,
Jieun.
EW2-047 T/Th
Hello Hyeji,
You live really wonderful environment! I will go to the Cherry Blossom Festival sometime. However, I had to search where is Suri Mountain, so I think you write that it is placed in Gunpo. Your post is very interesting and makes me envy you.
Have a good weekend,
Jieun.
Blog Draft #2
EW2-060 T/Th
Hi Jae min,
I absolutely agree your paragraph. The night of Seoul is very convenient and beautiful. However, I want to read specific data in your paragraph. I think that you can find any data in www.kostat,go.kr. It'll be helping you.
Have a good day,
Jieun.
EW2-047 T/Th
Hello Jiyon,
Thank you for giving me many information in your paragraph. I really want to visit SF. I think you lived at SF, right? Your descriptions are very specific! However, I want to read specific data in your paragraph. It'll be difficult to find the data about SF, but I suggest you find it and please write it.
Thank you for reading my comments,
Jieun.
EW2-035 W/F
Hi Chaeyeon,
I absolutely agree with your paragraph. A travel with friends has many advantages. However, I suggest you add the specific data. If you visit www.kostat.go.kr, you can find any data about your paragraph.
Thank you for reading my comments,
Jieun.
Hi Jieun,
답글삭제I agree with your first answer about other's comments. However, I think you misunderstand 2nd question. Gary wants that how your comments have taught you, not just write your comments.
Thanks,
Wonsik
Hi Jieun,
답글삭제I'm glad to read your post. I agree with your first answer. Other’s comments are very helpful for me. I think you misunderstood about second answer. It was just posting not your comments but your answer on your blog. I hope you to change your second answer.
Thanks,
Dongsik Kim.
Dear Jieun,
답글삭제I read your post very excitingly!
Also, I really agree with you that comments are very useful to us!
Moreover, many examples helps me to understand your state.
For these reason, I am quietly interesting while I read your blogpost.
However, I think you misunderstood that professor’s announcement on the blackboard.
I think you should have written how you think that your comments on other blogs influence your writing.
I think you better revise second question.
Have a nice day,
A-hyun.